Stop making yourself unhappy

14357367-seamless-vector-smileys-in-different-colorsA long time ago, I attended a support group entitled; Stop making yourself unhappy. And it left an indelible impression on me. We all go through times of sadness but there is a difference between experiencing a period of sadness or not coming out of it.

  • I learned that I had to move forward.
  • I learned that life does not automatically give me what I wish for.
  • I learned to believe in myself and to give up the idea that I could control my destiny.
  • I learned how to smile and enjoy the scenery on the way to wherever I was going.
  • I learned that we all make mistakes sometimes, and although I might feel that things might be running smoothly at present, it won’t always be that way.
  • I learned that failure is part of growth.
  • I learned that worthwhile goals take persistence and a great deal of work.
  • I learned to change my attitude to a lot of things and to be more optimistic.
  • I learned to take nothing for granted.
  • When I made a list of the negative as well as the positive aspects in my life … guess what? The positive aspects outnumbered the negative ones.
  • I learned how important exercise was and as I simply cannot get myself to go walking every day, I have chosen to do Latin American Dancing.
  • I learned from Oscar Wilde’s comment: Everything in moderation, including moderation. I know that bad eating habits will make me fat, spending recklessly will make me broke, working too hard and too long is not about keeping the happy medium and playing too much will mean that my work is left undone.
  • I learned that  my happiness depends on the way I balance the positive resources in my life and I have come to the conclusion that being happy is not found by doing one good thing; rather, it is a combination of activities and basically, learning how to live a balanced lifestyle.



4 thoughts on “Stop making yourself unhappy

  1. Pamela Spiro Wagner

    Reblogged this on WAGblog "dum spiro spero" and commented:
    I thought jill’s post was marvelous. She succeeds at a lot that i only aim at…but i should not put myself down. I have not achieved nothing, have i?. Nevertheless, i wanted to reblog her thoughts because she stated something so brilliantly, i just thought you should hear it from someone, even if it is not from me.

  2. Donna-1

    All of the above statements begin with “I learned…..” I’m glad to see the post began with “a long time ago”. A long time ago…I learned. As long as it WAS a long time ago, I can trust her statements. Because I am always and forever taking optimistic, positive-thinking kinds of statements and intending to make them a a part of my daily existence. I’m always hoping they will re-energize and transform my way of life.

    But statements don’t do that. Hard work does that. I can pin inspirational statements to my Pinterest board all day, and they are nice. And even greatly invigorating…for a few minutes. Until I see the full laundry basket in the corner, or step on the scales, or remember I’m supposed to take my mother to the doctor in an hour. I’m afraid, human that I am, that all inspiration flies out the window and life begins at these times.

    That’s when I need more than inspiration. I have a bedrock of faith, hope and love that keeps me going, especially when life threatens to take over and take away my happiness. These go beyond eating right, healthy exercise, and remembering that failures do not make of me a failure. Activities and lifetsyle changes are great, they just aren’t enough to keep me going. True: we cannot control our destiny. I’m not even sure we can get a good eyeful of our destiny, or even WANT to do so!

    For me, it comes down to doing what works for me any given day. If my happness that day is thwarted by insistence that I set aside my own wishes to take care of my mother, yeah, I can do that. I go and make HER day happy. My day will come, I tell myself. And often, in that act of giving, I give to myself as well.


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